Wednesday, August 31, 2011

Wedding Tip Wednesday: Bridesmaid's Bill of Rights

Since Melinda and I are both engaged (yay!), we are in full force planning mode. This means Melinda is dreaming up decorating schemes and finding vendor options while I read everything there is about etiquette, planning logistics and potentially difficult situations that often arise in such emotional times. We do a pretty good job of playing (oh wait, its working now!) together while providing different information and opinions :)

During one of my many extensive research sessions, I came across a great article at The Knot called the Bridesmaid's Bill of Rights. While Melinda has been a bridesmaid countless times, I have not so I figured this article would give me good insight. I was right. The Knot provides a spot at the bottom for the bride and bridesmaid to sign, but I think thats a bit much. Anyway, for your convenience I have posted the Bridesmaid's Bill of Rights below. For more info on what it means to be a bridesmaid, read about what Emily Post has to say.

Bridesmaids, current and future, this is a helpful guide to what is expected of you and what is unreasonable behavior from an otherwise level headed friend turned bride. Remember, you were chosen by the bride because you are a big part of her life and she knows she can count on you to help make her day lovely. And brides, take note and make sure to treat your favorite ladies in a way that reflects your love for them! There are so many wedding tasks that you shouldn't ask the girl who has never used (or had the desire) a glue gun to make all 150 place cards; rather, find something she may actually enjoy!


  1. You have the right to freedom of speech - sort of: If asked by the bride whether you like something, you may respond honestly. If not asked, you must forever hold your peace.
  2. You have the power to act with the bride's best interests in mind. If a troubling situation arises, you  have the authority to direct the photographer, bounce rowdy guests or ask the DJ to cease playing "Macarena" (or any overplayed pop song that you know the bride cannot stand).
  3. You have the right to weigh in on your dress. You also have the right to hope with all your heart that the bride chooses one that you find less than terrifying. However, in the event your dream does not come true, you have no right to complain for a single second.
  4. You have the right to veto cruel and unusual underwear: a Wonderbra that gives you porn-star cleavage, Spanx that cut off your circulation, panty hose the color of a bad sunburn.
  5. You shall not be forced by the bride to permanently alter your appearance for the sake of looking good in the wedding pictures. This includes, but is not limited to, dyeing your hair, removing tattoos or getting a nose job. *** 
  6. You have the right to call it quits on assemble-400-DIY-favors duty, but only after putting in enough hours to make your glue-gun-hand hurt. Don't forget, the bride needs your help (and she considers these things "fun").
  7. You have the right to keep your other job, your other friends and, yes, your other interests while undergoing your tour of duty. While your loving bride may occasionally forget this important fact, you will remind her nicely.
  8. You are relieved from your duties after the bride and groom head out on the honeymoon. If you want to do more, you can. But technically, you are free at last!

And the question(s) of the day: What were some good experiences you have had as a bridesmaid? Not all girls grow up obsessing over weddings; how would you approach bridesmaids that fall into this category with what what it means to be a bridesmaid?

***Do brides actually ask these things of their "friends"? Ridiculous.